"Guy Walks into a Psychiatrist's Office..." is the first episode and season premiere of Season 2 of the HBO original series The Sopranos. It is the 14th overall episode in the series. Written by Jason Cahill and directed by Allen Coulter, it originally aired on January 16, 2000.
- James Gandolfini as Tony Soprano
- Lorraine Bracco as Dr. Jennifer Melfi
- Edie Falco as Carmela Soprano
- Michael Imperioli as Christopher Moltisanti
- Dominic Chianese as Corrado Soprano, Jr.
- Vincent Pastore as Big Pussy Bonpensiero
- Robert Iler as Anthony Soprano Jr.
- Jamie-Lynn Sigler as Meadow Soprano
- Drea de Matteo as Adriana La Cerva
- Aida Turturro as Janice Soprano
- and Nancy Marchand as Livia Soprano
- Jerry Adler as Hesh Rabkin
Also guest starring
- Lillo Brancato Jr. as Matt Bevilaqua
- Chris Tardio as Sean Gismonte
- Oksana Lada as Irina Peltsin
- Nicole Burdette as Barbara Giglione
- David Margulies as Neil Mink
- Tom Aldredge as Hugh DeAngelis
- John Billeci as Loiaco
- Darrell Carey as Proctor
- Dan Chen as Ernest Wu
- Robert Cicchini as Dr. D'Alessio
- John Fiore as Gigi Cestone
- Mark Fish as Caller #2
- Karen Giordano as Samantha Martin
- Bryan Greenberg as Peter McClure
- Dan Grimaldi as Philly Parisi
- Philipp Kaner as Caller #3
- Katrina Lantz as Sylvia
- George Loros as Raymond Curto
- Wayne W. Pretlow as Caller #1
- Suzanne Shepherd as Mary DeAngelis
- Kevin Sussman as Kevin
- Roberto Thomas as Lee
- Ed Vassallo as Tom Giglione
- Terence Patrick Winter as Tom Amberson
Several months after Chucky Signore and Mikey Palmice's execution, and Livia Soprano's hospitalization, things are getting back to some sort of normality once again. Tony Soprano begins to self-medicate as he is no longer receiving therapy from Dr. Melfi, who begins working out of a motel after being warned that her office is no longer safe. Christopher Moltisanti hires someone to take his stockbroker's licensing exam. Uncle Junior is in prison. Carmela Soprano continues to play the role of housewife. Livia begins receiving physical therapy. Ray Curto continues to bring in the money for Tony — as do Paulie Gualtieri and Silvio Dante, who indulge in designer shoes and Bada Bing strippers. Tony continues to sleep with his Russian goomah, Irina, and hides that he was out all night by burying his clothes in a load of laundry. He then sneaks into bed and falls asleep. The following morning when Tony goes to fetch the paper, he sees an old Buick Riviera parked just outside his driveway. Tony starts to cautiously walk away, thinking this may be another hit, only to have Big Pussy Bonpensiero emerge and ask if they can talk.
Tony and Pussy go down to Tony's basement, where they discuss Pussy's absence. Pussy tries to explain that he was in Puerto Rico for back therapy and medical assistance but didn't want to tell his wife, since he started sleeping with his acupuncturist. He also no longer felt safe in New Jersey because of the impressions previously caused by Tony and his crew. Tony still does not trust Pussy completely and pats him down while giving him a hug. Pussy becomes offended at this but Tony pulls him in for another hug, a real one. At the Bada Bing!, the associates welcome Pussy while Silvio entertains the group with impressions from The Godfather.
Tony assigns former Junior Soprano crew soldier Gigi Cestone (who was brought over to Tony's crew after Tony became street boss because Tony knew he could control him) to take out active Junior Soprano crew soldier Philly "Spoons" Parisi after it was discovered Philly had been gossiping about Tony seeing a shrink and wanted his mother dead. Tony believed if Gigi performed the hit on a soldier from his own crew it would look less obvious. Gigi, putting on the pretense of returning home from a trip, has Paulie Gualtieri drop him off at the airport and is picked up by Philly. After Gigi gets all the specific details out of Philly, he shoots Philly in the head yelling "You big mouth fuck!" Tony calls Melfi on a pay phone informing her "it's over" and that she can come home.
Christopher is made the Securities and Exchange Commission U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) compliance officer (actually the "head") of an investment firm and is pressuring people to push a new worthless stock, Webistics. When Christopher takes a "meeting" down the shore (with Adriana La Cerva), he places Matt Bevilaqua, a fellow stockbroker, in charge. While Matt is doing his rounds with friend Sean Gismonte to make sure people are advising the purchase of Webistics, they discover one broker is not doing as he is told, and instead is providing general investment advice based on the needs of the customers. They proceed to pour hot coffee on him and administer a savage beating. The acting manager tells them to break it up but is threatened by Matt to go back to his office. The following day, Tony receives a phone call from the firm stating that Christopher is not doing his job well and that two employees left because of an "incident." Tony tells Christopher to be careful, to wise up and to make himself available at the firm instead of being a "no-show."
Tony then receives a phone call from Carmela, who informs him that his hippie sister Janice has resurfaced and is looking for a place to stay. Perturbed, he invites Janice to stay but knows that when she leaves he will be "$5,000 lighter." Tony suggests to Carmela that they have a big family reunion with Tony's younger sister, Barbara Giglione, and all of the children. He makes it clear that Livia is not to be invited.
While driving, Tony has a panic attack after his CD begins skipping as he runs off the road. He is not hurt since his airbag deploys after he runs into a barricade surrounding a utility box. He meets with another psychiatrist (under the alias of "Mr. Spears") to discuss his panic attacks and his mother. The psychiatrist tells Tony that he recognizes him and has seen Analyze This, and informs him that he is not taking new clients at this time.
Tony then talks to Janice about Livia and that he never wants her spoken of in the Soprano house again. Janice understands what is going on but will continue to see Livia and possibly occupy her house. Tony tells her that it is not possible since he is selling the house. Janice tries to convince him not to but her recommendations go unheeded. Tony and Carmela are soon asked to the house by a realtor who informs them that Livia's house was vandalized. Carmela then asks when Tony is getting back into therapy and tells him that her parents will be coming to the party as well. It is revealed that Carmela's parents avoided gatherings where Livia would be present, due to rude comments Livia had made to them.
At the party, everyone seems to be in good spirits except for Tony, who is angered about his mother. Carmela asks once again, "When are you getting back into therapy?" Tony states that he does not know but that he has been self-medicating. Carmela then suggests that he go have a good time with his friends and family and not worry about Livia. Tony does so and continues to joke around with Pussy. Meanwhile, Janice and Barbara are talking about Tony's handling of the situation. Janice thinks that no one is going to get their fair share from the house but Barbara believes that Tony is handling the situation very well and that he will give them both their fair share.
At a diner the following morning, Tony tries to apologize to Dr. Melfi, who is extremely upset that she could not help another patient who committed suicide. Tony feels bad but tries to ask her if he can come back or get a referral to another psychiatrist. She refuses and angrily tells him to get out of her life, and he leaves the diner. Carmela, who is surprised that Tony is home early, fixes him leftover spaghetti. As Tony sits and eats, he tells Carmela to sit and eyes her as she looks through the mail, juxtaposing Carmela's parents' relationship and giving Carmela more thought on their marriage.