"The Telltale Moozadell" is the 9th episode of Season 3 of the HBO original series The Sopranos. It is the 35th overall episode of the series. It was written by Michael Imperioli, directed by Dan Attias and originally aired on April 22, 2001.
- James Gandolfini as Tony Soprano
- Lorraine Bracco as Dr. Jennifer Melfi
- Edie Falco as Carmela Soprano
- Michael Imperioli as Christopher Moltisanti
- Dominic Chianese as Corrado Soprano, Jr. *
- Steven Van Zandt as Silvio Dante
- Tony Sirico as Paulie Gualtieri
- Jamie-Lynn Sigler as Meadow Soprano
- Robert Iler as Anthony Soprano, Jr.
- Drea de Matteo as Adriana La Cerva
- Aida Turturro as Janice Soprano
- Federico Castelluccio as Furio Giunta
- John Ventimiglia as Artie Bucco
- Joe Pantoliano as Ralph Cifaretto
- Jerry Adler as Hesh Rabkin
Also guest starring
- Tom Aldredge as Hugh De Angelis
- Sharon Angela as Rosalie Aprile
- Max Casella as Benny Fazio
- Jason Cerbone as Jackie Aprile, Jr.
- Louis Crugnali as Carlo Renzi
- Andrew Davoli as Dino Zerilli
- Will McCormack as Jason LaPenna
- Turk Pipkin as Aaron Arkaway
- Annabella Sciorra as Gloria Trillo
- Suzanne Shepherd as Mary De Angelis
- Nick Tarabay as Matush
Fifteen-year-old Stefani Germanotta, who would later become famous as Lady Gaga, makes an uncredited appearance as a classmate of A.J.'s. She is seated on the swimming pool bleachers, smoking a cigarette.
On Carmela's birthday, each member of the Soprano family presents her with a gift: Tony, a very large and expensive sapphire ring, A.J. purchases a copy of The Matrix on DVD, and Meadow gives her a gift certificate to a day spa, which she put on her mother's credit card and purchased one for herself as well. At Carmela's birthday party, Jackie Aprile, Jr. arrives late, just as they are about to sing "Happy Birthday" and apologizes for his tardiness. Afterward, A.J. is invited to a friend's house to spend the night and Meadow and Jackie go out to a movie. In bed, Carmela asks Tony why he did not buy the Mercedes SL that he had been considering. Tony replies that driving that car would make him look like a "douchebag".
Tony continues his affair with the Mercedes saleswoman, Gloria Trillo, who — according to Dr. Melfi and unbeknownst to Tony — has a suicidal past as well as an unhealthy relationship streak. They visit the Bronx Zoo on their next date. As they watch a gorilla, they passionately kiss and eventually end up in a deserted reptile house, where they have sex with their clothes on. On their next outing, they caress on a couch in an upscale hotel room where Gloria finds Tony's gun strapped to his ankle, which fascinates and arouses her. At her therapy session, Gloria is taken aback by Dr. Melfi's questioning -— in particular, the psychiatrist's inviting her to elaborate on the male voice that was heard during their last phone conversation. At his own session with Melfi, Tony tells her that he has had a very successful week and gives her a bonus on top of the week's remittance. Melfi senses that Tony is being dishonest in part, and tries to refuse the extra money, but Tony insists on leaving the cash. Melfi then answers her son's phone call. She confesses that she "hates all them" (referring to her patients) for lying to her. Her son tells her that he needs to buy some expensive books for college and Dr. Melfi looks down at the extra cash Tony left.
On the night of Carmela's birthday, A.J. and some of his friends break into their high school and swim in the pool. When they are finished swimming, a few people begin to throw things from the gym teacher's room in the pool, which escalates to garbage cans and trophies obtained when one of A.J.'s friends smashes the glass trophy case. Later, at the crime scene, the police find a pizza whose box has a recognizable logo. They question the owner of the pizza parlor, who says it's a special order. Upon being threatened with legal action if he withholds the name of the customer, the owner reveals it was the Soprano family's standing order. A.J. is sent home due to his involvement in the vandalism, and his parents attend a parent conference with the school principal and A.J.'s football coach the next day. The principal expels A.J., but, due to his importance on the football team (and purportedly, his academic record), suspended his sentence and opted to put A.J. on probation instead. Not feeling that the school's punishment was harsh enough, Tony and Carmela ground A.J. for a month with no television, DVDs, computer or Nintendo, and force A.J. to clean out the rain gutters. Tony and Carmela are slightly appalled when A.J. doesn't even know what a rain gutter is.
The DiMeo Family take over The Lollipop Club, a night club in Long Branch, New Jersey. Christopher Moltisanti gives the club to Adriana to manage, and she renames it "Crazy Horse". Christopher tells her that she will be the figurehead owner-manager and that the previous owner will work for her, as he ruined himself financially betting on a Minnesota Vikings game and had to give up his business as a result. Furio Giunta and Christopher own a large percentage as "silent partners"; Christopher also sees the club as an opportunity for the gang to run their business in a safe environment without FBI interference. However, at the opening, an ecstasy dealer named Matush is caught conducting his business in the bathroom and is soon thrown out; Furio warns him to stay off the property. Jackie, Jr. steps in to help his friend, and asks Christopher to let Matush continue his dealing inside the club. Christopher flatly refuses. Not wanting to be embarrassed, Jackie lies to Matush and tells him that Christopher approved Matush's making deals, but only outside the club. Matush does so, and is severely beaten by Furio and his men. While they prepare dinner at Rosalie's house, Jackie asks Ralph Cifaretto for a "piece" and, without much questioning from Ralphie, is given a .38 revolver.
Carmela is concerned about Meadow's relationship with Jackie Jr., but Tony assures Carmela that Jackie has his act together and will treat Meadow with respect. Carmela must hide her true feelings to remain friends with Rosalie Aprile, who is ecstatic about the arrangement. Meadow writes Jackie's English assignment, a paper on Edgar Allan Poe, and he receives an "A". After Tony has a heart-to-heart with Jackie, and stresses how, although he has always expected the best out of Jackie, this is different and far more serious now that Meadow is involved, Jackie promises Tony that he will work hard and be faithful to Meadow, maintaining credit for the paper that he left to Meadow to write for him. Tony warns Jackie that he will be keeping an eye on him. Tony then runs into Jackie at a local illegal casino, angrily scolding him and telling him to stay away and focus on his school work if he wants to continue seeing Meadow. The next morning at breakfast, Carmela tells Tony that Jackie took Meadow to see Aida in New York City, which makes her rethink her original impression of Jackie, as he is on his best behavior around the Soprano residence, and even bonds with A.J., mentoring him in football.
- Matush Giamona: Drug-dealer who hangs around the Crazy Horse.
- The episode's title is a play on Edgar Allan Poe's short story "The Tell-Tale Heart". Moozadell is rough Italian-American slang for mozzarella cheese (which is commonly used on pizza), but can also be used as a derogatory name for an Italian man, according to Michael Imperioli.
- The title also refers to Jackie Aprile, Jr.'s dishonest dealings with Tony and Matush.
- The title also refers to Jackie's essay on Edgar Allan Poe, which Meadow wrote for him.
- The title also refers to A.J.'s custom made pizza with extra mozzarella cheese — leaving the pizza at the high school led to the police to determine that A.J. and his friends were responsible for the vandalism.